Someone
who is no more cannot put up any defense –this is usually something that people
always forget, why should we pretend during burials? After all they can’t hear
us? This is where we go wrong, I tend to think that we should be honest as we possibly
can.
I
am sure all of us have lost loved ones and have at one time or another attended
burials over the years, the first thing that catches your eyes during this
painful events is the fashion style, what with the whole black ensemble, big
black hats, black shiny sunglasses, stockings and to top it all the teary eyed
lasses and gentlemen who are always doing the knight in shining armor thing on
the fainting ladies! Its not surprising to find out that most of them were not
even related to the guy in the casket.
Ok
I’m not here to criticize just painting a picture of what is normally seen
there, my issue here is with the lies that harbor the events come the speech
time, lucky you if you are named among the speakers because then you can pour
your heart out either positively in the case of Kenyans why oh why do you have
to go through that excruciating process of lying through our teeth…the truth
shall set you free I always say, don’t mind the talks after all the society is
there to do so!but you would have greatly helped.
Once I was to speak at a colleagues burial and
had so much to say and to tell the truth they weren’t nice things, he had died
of a car accident due to drunken driving and I wasn’t about to ruin his
reputation in front of all those mourners, I had to have a speech but on the
eve of the burial all I had to show was ‘ladies and gentlemen’. I decided to
reveal the good the bad and the ugly but on the dreaded day I found myself
praising him almost declaring him a saint! I regret my actions, and I promised
there and then to always say what is in my heart, regardless of the
consequences.
If
the dead guy was as stingy as the word goes then why not raise hell and admit
the truth and in the process advising those with same characteristics out there
to stop the behavior! If he was one of those corrupt guys always asking for kitu kidogo why not say his ways were
shrewd? I am probably digging my own grave at this moment but I’m not shying
away from the reality and believe me I do understand that as human beings we
hate being seen as hypocrites and especially by the deceased relatives, but how
many times have we heard only good things about the deceased knowing very well
that the latter was the rudest or meanest person you knew and there they are explaining how he or she
was always concerned about people’s welfare or how they were always there to
listen to your problems! I am sure that if people’s thoughts were read out loud
for all and sundry to see hell would probably freeze over!
I
don’t disagree that it’s an omen to speak ill of the dead, but why were you not
that appreciating when the poor guy was alive? Why wait till he’s gone? Why
cover up the crazy things he used to do? When finally after the ceremony you
will go on explaining to all who care to listen how he had borrowed large sums
of money that you don’t even know how the family is ever going to repay!
So
if you are attending a burial I dare you to shed off the mask!!
By:
Beautiful Nyakio
